The human race

Two murders in a space of two days. And a murder weapon found relatively nearby. No, that shouldn't be the main cause of alarm. Rather the cold-bloodedness of both makes them even more scary. One, shooting not one, but five (or was it six?) shots at point blank. The other, husband killing pregnant wife, even though they had two young kids.

What is the world coming to?

Couldn't help but recall a comment that I had on a friend's blog, that emotions are what make people unique. But are emotions really that good or imporant? From the looks of these news, it really doesn't seem so. Otherwise, why on earth would that husband kill his wife, and the unborn child? And cause his two young daughters to become orphans at such a young age (that is on the assumption that he'll be charged and convicted of murder, of course)? Was he truly thinking at that point in time? Or did emotions get the better of him?

The ability to feel is such a funny creature. Met up with a friend earlier and she updated me on some personal matters. There are many extreme forms of emotions that can be cured just by a simple act. Yet, such act though simple, may still take years before they surface. Of course, it's always better late than never and I'm relatively glad for her.

For the way too observant people, yes, I would realise that you've noticed the word "relatively".

It's not that I'm not really happy for her, but rather, as I've mentioned earlier this evening, it has more of my numbness lately. Have you ever had the situation where your brain tells you, "yahz, that's a cause of happiness/sadness" but you just can't feel anything? To the point that you sometimes wonder if you would feel any pain even if you prick yourself with a tiny needle? It's just like the other day when I said I experienced this weird feeling. Under normal circumstances (I mean in the past), I can imagine myself feeling unhappy. But that day, it didn't feel anything, well, other than the weird feeling where my brain was saying that I'm not too happy, but I just couldn't feel it.

That reminds me of another recent incident although it has nothing to do with numbness. Somehow though, I don't know whether it is good news or not. On one hand, I should be awfully glad that at least one part of me is still behaving like the old me. But on the other, I think this characteristic is definitely not something to be proud of. In any case, I am still very scared of people being over grateful, I guess. Come to think of it, I really do regret doing that delivery. It was so much of a case of spontaneous actions without using my brains to think. I should have anticipated the (in my humble opinion) over grateful reaction, that would in turn bring about my "reflex" reaction of retreating and then the wanting to avoid the person as much as I can help it syndrome. Yes, even more than when I think I've confided a bit way too much to that person.

Oh well, that's the ability to feel coming into play again. Afterall, scared/wary are also emotions, right? No wonder people like Gary, Guoxing and Honghui said that I was complex. Incidentally, I thought that "test" was interesting more because it showed how much those who took the test know me. For some weird (at least in some people's eyes) reasons, I'm actually happier to see the "negative" traits being chosen rather than the positive ones. Mainly because it's only those who know me better or at least care to observe me closer who will notice the less ideal traits and dare to say it too, for that matter. For the same reasons perhaps, I would not ask some people to do that test at all, for fear of seeing all the positively wonderful (and not to mention, fake) traits and then feeling hurt at the results.

Haha.. people do not deem me as complex for no good reason huh? =)

25/02/2006: Once again, I repeat, I've left out a certain link that was here initially to ward off unwanted pests.