Perceptions
Was talking to an ex-schoolmate/classmate over lunch today, and the topic wandered to her view that smokers are not considered guai. All of a sudden, that phrase sounded all so familiar. Once upon a time, I was like her too. I simply did not like smokers FULLSTOP. But then, as I left the sheltered world of school, started doing temp jobs, studied at TMC etc, somewhere somehow, the fullstop became qualified.

You see, along the way, I made good friends, big brothers who do smoke. And whilst I was mixing with them, it never occurred to me to stay away just because they were smokers. Friends, especially those whom you trust and can rely on, are so rare.. that it is simply not worth it to categorise people according to the fixed, sheltered mindset. And that is how big brothers like Alvin, Darmaji (I don't think Itak smokes, though I can't really remember) remain people I look up to till now, and I'm sure it will continue to be so many years down the road.

Of course, all these are qualified, simply because there is still a threshold. Basically, I do not mind them being smokers because they do not blow the smoke on my face, or maybe, it's because they are my friends. (Don't ask me which one comes first though, cause I don't know)

But the main point I'm driving at is that, people's perceptions do change with time, so what we think of as absolute now may not necessary be so in a few years, months or even days time. Don't ask me whether it has something to do with people mellowing with age though, cause I don't know, and I do not want to believe so. =)

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On my way back this evening, I bumped into Sherwin and his mum on the train. Somehow, meeting Sherwin on the train today just brightens up the evening. Just now, my mum was commenting that there must have been some words going around the office, otherwise, I wouldn't be asked by so many people whether I am THAT scholar. The point is, sometimes, the truth may not be what you want to know. So what if I know that they have been talking about me? Would the knowledge make me happier? I seriously doubt so. In fact, given their high interest in asking me that question, I do not think that any talk about me would be THAT positive, so why should I know and make myself unhappy right? Right now, I'll just be happy being "ignorant", asking the LAs for work, and just basically learning as much as I can and not be bothered by others' perceptions. Afterall, what others think can't hurt me that much if I choose not to let them do so, right? =)

PS: Despite my resolution to do something in one of my earlier entries, I still can't help but type this, even if the person it's meant for does not read this. Afterall, I'm sure one of his best friend still reads this and I can always trust that you will remind him. Anyway, I'm not sure if this ex-classmate of mine still has this bad habit of NOT changing contact lenses even after one month is up, but in lieu of the recent news surrounding contact lenses and contact lenses solution, for goodness sake, CHANGE YOUR CONTACT LENSES MORE FREQUENTLY!

Does negative reading really bode ill?

There's this website that sends me weekly predictions for the week, and lately, the readings seem to be getting from bad to worse. Not that I religiously believe in them, but from the events of the past few months, I just can't help thinking that they are more or less accurate.

This week's reading doesn't sound super favourable too.. I still hope it's not that accurate.. Dons said I'm wishy-washy when we were talking about a certain scholarship. I can't help but agree, but I'm getting even more scared of making decisions.

On another note, I can't stand certain tuition kid's parent. I replied her sms this morning when I came in and I've already had 3 smses and 1 phone call from her. She's going to drive me nuts. But.. tuition is still a necessity, so I'll just have to grit my teeth and bear with it.