Can't help but be in the reflective mood again.. Maybe it's the night, or the songs that I was listening to on my way home, or maybe it's just the end of the year again.
These few days, I've been having really weird dreams. It's been half a year since I've graduated from NUS, yet almost everyday, my dreams revolve around me still being in NUS.. either that, or the backdrop of my dreams were all NUS based. Such a familiar feeling. It wasn't too long ago that I would dream of classroom based dreams. How time flies..
Yesterday's dream was interesting. If dreams were a reflection of what goes on in my mind, I seriously have no idea how that dream came about. Or maybe I do. 2 friends from the same faculty were upset.. one said he was and the other just showed it. And I was more worried for the latter. Perhaps that was just a reflection, an indication of real life too, for certain friendships just get more bland along the way..
Read a certain Mr Chan's blog.. He had this quiz that allowed one to reflect on the year that is about to end. And then, there was a certain Mr Tan's nick on MSN that posed a question somewhat to the effect of whether you would change anything if you could turn back time (ehz.. I really can't remember clearly, so if you are reading this, don't blame me if I remembered, wrongly, k, Mr Randall?)
Those who've had read my previous blog (if you haven't and don't know the blog address, hey, that's YOUR problem, not mine.. haha) would know that quite a few events in the previous year made me decide that being cold was the way to be. Compared to the time when I forced myself to be less emotional just because of a comment Jini made before I entered law school, these events were so much better at changing me. At least in my own opinion, I thought I had become a lot colder and numb-er, or so I think.. Thankfully, some things still keep me slightly likeable.. But you know how fried ice-cream is hot on the outside but really cool on the inside? I guess I'm just the opposite.. Cold on the outside but warmer inside.. That is, if I bother to stop being cold..
Speaking of which, I was really thrilled when I got home and saw 2 personal Christmas cards. It's not the number of cards that matter, but the contents and the people who sent it. Thanks Daniel! I'm so sorry I was way too tired to write you a card, but don't worry, I'll send you another card soon! And don't worry, I'm sure ALL of us would remember to meet up in May/June.. Even if you are busy, we can still turn up at your place since you've just given us your address, RIGHT? hahaha...
The other card came from Qiuyan. 10 years. That's how long since I've first known and last seen her. As she aptly pointed out, it's so wonderful to know that somewhere out in the world, there's always another friend.. even if you don't meet up. Reminds me of kor and Guowen too. Net friends of 10 years. Still remembered I knew kor from the S-league chat room when S-league first started.. That's where I knew Johnson too.. As for Guowen, it was a really weird way to start of a net friendship that has since sprawned a decade. I think we've only chatted once before he mailed me a Christmas card. Still have that card till now. Hmm.. wonder how he's been now.. and wonder when he'll see the Christmas card I sent, as per our usual habit each Christmas..
Although people do grow up and things become different, certain things will always remain the same in some tiny corner in your heart. Maybe that's what makes me still so childish a person. Whatever the case, let's hope that the friendship that I treasure most will not be eroded along with time...
Note: The certain Mr Radio just put up his sub-nick again just for me (or so he says) though I think it's more likely that he just wants me to put up his sub-nick correctly. Anyway, it's supposed to be "if you could rewind your time, would you change your life" It's not that much different from what I remembered, right? =p
