Moving on..

Is it a sign of having grown up when one is no longer as badly affected by changes?

Yesterday was Teresa's last day. The tinge of regret, wishing time would pass more slowly, was faint, at best. Perhaps having one more ally in a strangely unsettling place feels good.

Come to think of it, I can't really remember what I felt on my last day. How did it feel when I would no longer be my pupil master's pupil? The only thing I remembered most clearly was still the things that Siang Pheng said to me, and how touched I was by his simple gesture. And how disappointed I was, that my pupil master didn't even say a single thing.

I guess I'm still very proud that Christopher was my pupil master. Yes, even if he's not that well known. He's still my pupil master.

When Irene told me Chris was going for the Income Day dinner, a thought occurred to me. I should have accepted the invitation, just so that I can see my pupil master again. And then, it dawned upon me, that V being the big mouth, might just blabber off something not quite right. And the bitch, would she tell V what happened during one part of the pupillage? I shudder to think.

Before I digress even further..

Perhaps one reason why I didn't feel that affected by Teresa's departure was cause of my dinner appointment that night. The present that I had prepared, but was so worried of mailing out lest it gets lost, would now find itself in the hands of the rightful owner. In any case, I hope you liked that present, da ge!

Somehow, even the chat with Itak seemed to revolve around moving on. One thing Itak said that struck me was.. "If you keep holding on to the money in case something happens, aren't you just waiting for something to happen?"

You know, for all the advices given to me, yours just somehow had the greatest impact.

Thanks Itak da ge, for always dishing out advice in a palatable manner.. Sometimes, you're also good at noticing things, just as when you said how sometimes we get opinion to reaffirm what we think. At the end of the day, the opinions received may just end up confusing us even further.

If opinions serve only to confuse, close your eyes and think through where you would want to see yourself in in future. Nothing is absolutely certain, but I certainly would love to see my friends doing what they like instead of pushing themselves on in a field that they're not that keen on, just for the sake of pushing on. Just as, yes, some people might have already have a headstart early in life, but that doesn't mean that you can't do as well. If you have a passion for something, I'm sure you would put your entire heart and soul to it too.

And even if you do lose your way in the midst, your friends are still willing to provide the bulb to light up your path too. Never mind what others say, just think it through carefully, and make an informed decision. Whatever decision it is, I'll definitely provide my utmost support! =)

Yesterday was Darmaji and Alan's birthday. Happy belated birthday, my 2 big brothers!! =)

It was really nice to hear from Darmaji again, thanks to Itak for giving me his cousin's number. Better make sure you do remember to call when you're in Singapore, I'm definitely game enough to buy you dinner!

Meisi's birthday tomorrow. Should I cancel one tuition to visit her? [I should have cancelled that Taiwan family's tuition, since they're so irritating] Actually, I'm just hesistant cause I'm still unable to leave the hospital without letting my mood plunge to an all time low. Meisi, would you realise that in a few hours time, you would be officially 24 years old? I wonder what your birthday wish would be...

Oh, and Sham should have left for UK last night.

Perhaps... moving on is, but inevitable.

[PS (to Guoxing): Somehow, I've only just noticed your comments for your birthday entry a few days ago. =) Considering how much you sounded like you love having your name announced all over my blog, I shall.. try my best to grant that wish.. Haha..]