Itak da ge was the first to get to the High Court. If I were to say that I was super happy to have Gek Koon promise to come down for my call that day, then I can say that I was immensely excited when Itak da ge smsed me last night using a Singapore number. He did come down to Singapore afterall for serious matters. It didn't matter simply because he could drop by for my mass call! That's like such a rare guest at a place that reminds me of him and Darmaji too! Just as I told someone else last night "you lose something, you'll gain something in return". Some friends may no longer be as close, but it's not that bad given that I've Itak da ge as one of the friends in exchange for those close friends lost. He may not be always as book smart, but he's always able to drop words of wisdom whenever I needed any, listen to me whine within judging me before that. Itak da ge, xie xie ni!!
Of course, how can any of these photo sessions be without my dearest, nicest, most wonderful friend Mr Tay? You know, even though I didn't say it (cause I think you'll just get irritated by me thanking you non-stop) I'm actually super grateful that you made the effort to wake up early just to take photos with me. Just that I'm such a useless friend, somehow, for my commencement and today's call, I seem to be always neglecting you. How else can you explain this only photo of you? But you know, that day when you said you'll definitely come down unless you oversleep, I was already super super happy. It really doesn't matter whether you did oversleep in the end (although knowing you, you won't if you've made a promise) because it's just the thought that matters and I'm sure you knew that you turning up can just make my day. Thanks for always being the friend I could depend on during JC, through university and all the way till now. Really... thank you!!!
Somehow, it seems like I'm destined never to consume any food from these functions. By the time I was done with my photo taking in the auditorium, I was already one of the last to leave! Still, that wasn't that bad since at least I would have space to have lunch with Itak, Koon and Tee Meng.
Actually, with 2 of my closest friends turning up, I should have been over the moon, completely hyperactively estatic. Somehow though, even though I was really really happy, in the end, something stupid that I did became a dark cloud that eclipsed over my otherwise super happy day. I shouldn't have been so wilful, such that even though I realised my fault a (long) while later, it was a bit late to "make amends". Plus the telephone conversation. Somehow it just casted that dark shadow for the rest of the day, which somehow I just couldn't get rid of.
In the end, I still cancelled all my tuitions. Poor Itak had to walk with me from our lunch area, which was near UOB Plaza, to the old High Court for more photos.
Itak da ge is really a super nice big brother. As we were walking from CityLink Mall through Suntec, my ankles were beginning to truly hurt a little. But because I didn't want Itak to know, I just ignored the pain and walk as per normal. There was one point when he suddenly ask if my feet hurt, and when I said no, he actually said something to the extent of "You are lying if you say it doesn't hurt". Da ge bu kui shi da ge. And despite me refusing to admit, he still made me sit down once to wait for him and instead of walking back to the MRT, we simply took a train (although it was already like 6+++pm by then, meaning we had walked for hours!). Ah.. and that was when we bumped into Fer-Fer with Dingquan. To think that Fer has just graduated and is working already! It just seem like yesterday when she was still one of the juniors in RGCO!
******
To the friend I was really mean to today:
In the end, I really still want to apologise.
I guess when I first said those words, it really didn't occur to me how un-nice they sounded. Perhaps it was just the rebellious me not liking the fact that I was supposed to do something before you would do me that favour. That was really in jest, really, and I got your friend to help me take the photo, because someone else was asking you to help them take the photo then. And then, I was just running around taking other photos with people right beside me that I forgot all about it until much later. That was when I realised how mean I sounded, felt guilty and called you.
I really didn't realise that I sounded that hostile. Come to think of it, I really did cause you to xia bu liao tai in front of your friend. I'm really really sorry. I really didn't notice my tone. Perhaps, I admit, I was a bit irritated by something I heard from another some days ago. Still, just as what Itak and Gek Koon had chided me about, that was really not a valid excuse for my tone. I guess I realised it was wrong even before they 'reprimanded' me, cause immediately after hearing you said that, somehow, I just felt really bad for the rest of the day. Perhaps it sounds pretty stupid, but I guess it's because what you said made sense, that's why the words just stayed for the rest of the day, and made me reflect.
Whatever it is, (even if there are some things that you say/do that I may not agree with) I'm still really glad to have had you as my classmate during PLC, for the few times when you had not much choice but to 'hear' me 'say/complain about' some not-so-happy stuff. For that, I'm really really grateful. And I guess, this almost one year worth of PLC and then pupillage would have been much less colourful if you hadn't (unfortunately for you) been in my tutorial class during PLC, or you hadn't (unfortunately for you, once again) been asked to help another classmate reserve a seat (I think that was the first time I said anything to you.. hmm) So you see, I really really really didn't mind the photo even though I sounded so to you, cause you were part of the memories of this short but eventful growing up journey too. Hmm.. it doesn't make sense nor sound right.. but I presume you understand what I'm trying to get at, right?
Actually, I've got a pretty dumb suggestion.. I really don't mind still taking a photo... errr.. at some more scenic place though.. something like the old high court! (Although err... we should try weekends, so as to seem less dumb) If you are interested, then just tell me and I won't return the court robe so soon..
In any case, I really want to say:
I'm really really really sorry, Kum Fu!
I really shouldn't have behaved the way I did today, even though I really didn't mean it the way you saw it. Still, it's not really a valid excuse, so I really hope you won't take it to heart. I guess you've finally realised what misfortune it is to know of my existence right? Yah.. sorry for my really really childish and like you said, ren4 xing4 behaviour. Sorry!
Yaofang
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